Peek-a-boo

“Wake the Bambino up and I’ll drill him in the ass.” Pedro Martinez could not have been more eloquent when blaspheming the spirit of Babe Ruth. Truth be told, the Babe probably would not have hit a home run off of Martinez, but he would have gotten a hit, and after getting to first base, the Babe would have ordered a hot-dog, downed a ice-cold Coors Light and blew a kiss at Martinez who would be fixing his jock strap that had just been handed to him by someone whose idea of HGH stands for Hookers, Gin and Hot-dogs.

Why the recant of Pedro’s (in)famous insult to the Babe? Because I am superstitious, and I do believe in curses, and I do believe that uncovering this jersey was a bad thing for the Yankees. Besides all the bad joo-joo that comes with messing with someone else whose trying to “F” with a whole team of people, there could very well be a reverse effect what we intended by digging up the dumb thing. Picture this: David Ortiz’ jersey is buried under the visiting side of Yankees Stadium and his batting average is lower than what Lindsay Lohan blows into a breathalizer her first night out of rehab. Now the jersey is unearthed, and there is a strong possibility that the slump that Big Papi was in is now going to be unearthed as well.

If Big Papi starts turning things around, reburying the jersey should be strongly considered, and for good measure we should bury a few more jerseys, and a mock set of Manny’s dreads, regardless of whether they’re even real and not part of that skully thing. Ken Griffey Jr. could get away with wearing his hat backwards in the outfield and no one would care…Manny, you look like the son of a crack-whore and Bob Marley, just so you know.